I know I shouldn’t complain because my parents are really supportive of my dancing and have made a lot of sacrifices to make sure I can pursue my passion. I have been competing at my studio for a few years now, and we also go to Nationals and travel to conventions on the weekend sometimes.
But OMG, my mom is driving my crazy this year. In the past she’s been totally fine. Just a normal, supportive mom. But this year, I don’t know what’s up—she posts nonstop about my accomplishments on Facebook, which I know sounds nice, but it’s so embarrassing and feels really showy. At the studio, she has gone from being super chill to being really intense. She’s suddenly volunteering to do everything, she’s constantly at the studio, she’s chatting (maybe gossiping?) with the other parents all the time, and she’s not a total stage mom, but she’s just…a little much for me right now. I love her and appreciate all she’s done for me, but I can’t take this much longer! Any advice?
It’s great that your mom is so supportive of you and your dancing, and it’s good to hear she’s still on the mildly chill spectrum rather than lining up to join the next cast of “Dance Moms.”
Now, not to be totally preachy, but here’s the thing: Parents and teenagers really rarely see eye-to-eye. It can be hard to relate to one another. Everyone’s hormones are all over the place. It can get, well, intense—to say the least.
What’s most important is that you remember what you said first: that your mom has done a lot to make sure you can keep dancing. Never stop appreciating that!
But what you can do—without your mom telling you you’re an ungrateful brat, promise—is just talk to her! Be gentle and remember that she has feelings, too. She’s not really doing anything wrong here, she’s just driving you a little nuts.
Tell her you need a bit of space. Tell her having her at the studio while you’re rehearsing makes you nervous, and you can’t focus on your performance when she’s right outside the door, gabbing away with the other moms. And tell her that while it means the world to you that she’s so proud of you, that the Facebook posts make you feel self-conscious.
Your mom loves you, so be kind and remember that everything she’s doing for you is out of love. She cares—maybe a little too much at times—so remember to pick your battles.